Mental health education experience

It has never been a "treatment patch" for "psychologically ill" people, but a "psychological safety cushion" for all ordinary people. The core goal is never to eliminate negative emotions, but to teach you to learn to coexist with emotions and to get up when you fall down.

Last September, I met a little girl who was a sophomore. She had failed two required courses for her major and was hiding in the dormitory stairwell crying. When her roommate came to find her, she had been squatting there for almost three hours. Before, people around her tried to persuade her, "You just failed the exam, you just need to take the make-up exam." "You just think too much." However, the more they advised her, the more she collapsed, saying, "You all think I'm useless, right?" I didn't persuade her at that time, so I sat next to her and handed her tissues, and cried with her for half an hour. When she had cried enough, she muttered to herself, saying that she was actually afraid of being disappointed by her parents who were working in other provinces, and felt that she had spent money to study and failed, and was too useless. If we follow the cognitive-behavioral school of thought, then we have to help her break away from the unreasonable belief that "failed the exam = I am a waste". The results are quick. Many school psychological counselors like to use this method. ； But according to the humanistic school of thought, the most important thing at the moment is to make her feel that "my current sadness is allowed" and that there is no need to rush to "get better." I chose the latter at the time. I didn't make any sense, so I told her, "It would be hard for me too. Anyone else would have been aggrieved after spending a whole semester and failing the class." She chatted with me until the dormitory was closed that day. The next week, she took the initiative to find the study committee to review the materials. She passed the make-up exam smoothly. Later, she stuffed me with half a box of lime-flavored mints, saying that the candies I handed me when I cried last time were delicious.

Speaking of which, when I first became a psychology committee member, my impression of mental health education was still that of holding large lectures, giving PPTs on suicide prevention, and filling out various psychological test forms. Not to mention that my classmates found it annoying, I felt that it was just a formality. It wasn’t until that time that I slowly understood that good mental health education is not about correcting other people’s “wrongs” with standard answers, but about catching the other person’s emotions first.

Later, I went to the community to do science popularization volunteering, and it was even more interesting to meet retired Aunt Zhang. She always said that her whole body hurt, and she went to the hospital seven or eight times to check whether there was anything wrong. Her family members thought she was "faking illness," and she felt aggrieved. At that time, we held a small gardening therapy activity and gave each elderly person a pot of small tomato seedlings, asking them to water and prune them every week. Aunt Zhang never failed to do so. She squatted there and talked to her little tomatoes when she came. Two months later, she told me that her arms hurt less often. She used to wonder "Am I terminally ill" when she had nothing to do at home, but now she thinks about when the tomatoes will turn red every day, and she has no time to think about it. You see, for the elderly, they don't understand what "the somatization of anxiety" is about. Planting a small tomato is more useful than ten large lectures.

Of course, I have also heard many people criticize mental health education as "poisonous chicken soup", or even call it PUA in disguise - I have also encountered this kind of deviation. Previously, a friend's company engaged in "employee psychological counseling", and in the end it turned out to be "be grateful to the company for giving you a job opportunity, and you are under great pressure because of your own incompetence". That is indeed nonsense. In fact, there has been a quarrel in the industry now. Some people think that mental health education should be practical and teach everyone various tricks to regulate emotions so that they can be used immediately when encountering problems. ； Some people think that it should not be too utilitarian, and that it is necessary to popularize general knowledge first, so that people will not think of "psychological counseling" as "mental illness" when they mention "psychological counseling". Eliminating prejudice is the first priority. In fact, there is nothing wrong with both of these statements. They are just facing different scenarios. When giving lectures to high school students, they must first teach practical skills on how to relieve test anxiety. When giving science popularization to community residents, they must first say that "it is not shameful to see a psychologist when you are in a bad mood."

Speaking of which, I also benefited from it. I failed the postgraduate entrance examination last year. I squatted in the rental house for three days without going out and didn't want to eat. The "5-4-3-2-1 Emotional Landing Technique" I learned before suddenly appeared. I clutched the ice Coke I just took out of the refrigerator and counted the 5 that I could see around me. Three blue things: the handle of a takeaway bag, a computer stand, slippers, the edge of the curtain, a mineral water bottle on the floor, and four other things that could be touched: an ice Coke can, the velvet fabric of the sofa, keys, and a mobile phone case. Slowly, I felt that the stone blocking my chest was loosening a little, and I got up and cooked a bowl of noodles. In the past, I might have scolded myself, "I'm really useless. I'm just looking for death if I don't pass the exam." But after studying mental health education, I know that it's normal to be sad. You don't need to force yourself to be "positive" immediately, just calm down.

Now I still have the empty box of mints given to me by the little girl in my drawer, as well as the small tomatoes that Aunt Zhang stuffed for me last time. They are bright red. I no longer think mental health education is something high-end. To put it bluntly, it teaches you two things: First, all your emotions are reasonable and there is no need to feel embarrassed. ； Secondly, no matter what happens, you are not alone and there is always a way to recover. It's that simple.